Journal
“The site will grow along with me. Right now it's about the dark, because that's where I am. When I find my way to the light, it will go there too, and take everyone who reads it along.”
Supporting someone through a hard time? What to write when someone is struggling →
HerWay grows a little every week. New stories usually find their way here on Saturday mornings, with a good cup of coffee.
The Weight You Learn to Carry
When good advice can't reach the place where it hurts: a story about walking anyway, one tired step at a time.
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Enough Just by Being Here
A small palm that never asked how I was, and what it taught me about being enough just by being here.
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How Did I Deserve You?
Every evening a very big dog climbs into my lap. A story about the pure soul who loves without terms, and kept me here through the storm.
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The Slowest Poison
Doubt has no color and no smell. It works slowly, drop by drop, and for years I didn't notice I was being poisoned.
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Before the World Wakes Up
An early autumn walk with Tobby: empty streets, the first birds, cool air, and the small warm moment that carries me through the day.
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I Can't Remember the Good Days
Someone asked me about a good moment from the past year, and nothing came. Not because there were none. Because grief takes up the whole room.
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The First Time I Chose Myself
A message that reached me in Bari, a close friendship I ended without anger, and the day self-respect finally became something I could afford.
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The Laugh I Do for Others
I laugh so that no one has to feel uncomfortable around my sadness. And then I go home empty.
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From Must to Can
Years on must and autopilot, and the quiet morning I noticed that two words had come back: I can.
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The Words That Hurt, and the Three That Helped
What I heard in my grief, the pity and the hurry, and the only three words that ever helped.
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Who Am I When No One Introduces Me?
Known by whose light I stood in, not by my own name, and the question that came when the applause moved somewhere else.
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Silence Is Still My Shelter
On the years every song felt like a lie, the quiet I still choose, and six films I know by heart because I know how they end.
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I Didn't Watch the Stage
Two tickets to Paris, more than ninety thousand people, and the night I watched my daughter's dream come true.
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Fine, Thank You
On the question everyone asks, the truth that made me feel worse, the polite lie I couldn't bear, and the only answer that was both kind and real.
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A Cup to Hold On To
On the morning coffee I never drank for the taste, the small anchor it became, and keeping the moment after letting go.
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It Was Never Only in My Head
On the part of grief nobody warns you about: when it moves into your sleep, your body and your energy.
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By My Own Free Will
On always being the one who steps aside, the price I thought I had to pay to be worth something, and learning to say no.
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A Page I Don't Remember Writing
On finding a notebook page I have no memory of writing, and the hopeful woman who wrote it in the longest winter of my life.
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The House I Forgot to Live In
On making a home in other people, coming back to the house I had left empty for years, and learning to forgive it.
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Where My Heart Started Beating Again
Three days in Bari: the smell of the sea, the taste of food, tears in the crypt of Saint Nicholas, and the moment hope came back.
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So What If It Hurts
On pain as proof that I am still alive, the small word that kept me waiting, and the work that carried me through.
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A Comedy That Made Me Cry
Three men, an angel, and a play announced as a comedy. I laughed, and then I realized I was watching myself.
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The Birds Know First
On being a woman who digs too deep, the grey days on autopilot, and the quiet signs that a long night is ending.
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The Book That Kept Me Swimming
A book that found me in my darkest time, the faith that kept me swimming when I couldn't see the shore, and the few people who stayed.
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Something That Is Mine
It was never enough for me, and believing it was felt like torture. How HerWay was born: the first thing in my life that is completely mine.
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The Paint Goes Where It Wants
I had never held a pencil. Then, in my hardest season, I started pouring paint, and learned what happens when you let go.
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Half a Life
On reaching the middle of life, the blame I carried for years, and beginning to suspect that the voice calling it wasted was wrong.
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Six Green Lights
A daily wish at six traffic lights, a horoscope every morning, and what I learned about magic buttons and small steps.
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The Good Girl
On being raised to be good, living by someone else's plan, and learning that I matter too.
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The Drive Home
An hour on the road, a darkness that made it hard to breathe, and the one word that brought me back.
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Where My Feet Touched the Ground
Wet grass, a black night sky and walks with no destination. How the earth held me up when nothing else could.
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No Performance
A week alone with Tobby: no cooking, no tidying, no need to speak. And what I learned about the part I thought I had to play.
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Something to Be Grateful For
Gratitude doesn't fix a storm. But even on the worst days, something small is still holding on to you.
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The Wet Nose and the Word “Must”
There was a time when, quite suddenly, there was nothing left to live for. And there was Tobby, a wet nose and a pair of faithful eyes.
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HerWay grows a little every week. New stories usually find their way here on Saturday mornings, with a good cup of coffee.
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